For the same reason someone might seek hypnosis to eradicate bad habits, I decided to give: Removing Mogli's naughtiness a bash this week...
Steps to take:
- As she starts to fall sleepy on your knee, whisper calmly whilst gently stroking her nose
- Tell her that she's feeling sleepy, that she must surrender all control
- Remind her that she is so cute and beautiful when she's GOOD
- Remind her that she's living in a lovely home, with delicious food at the end of one meow
- Remind her that she ought to be grateful
- Tell her that she looks unpleasant with her ears back, her pupils dilated and her claws out
- Tell her that, contrary to her belief, she's not big and scary when she does that sideways, bushy-tailed maneouvre at you
- Chewing feet is BAD
- Tell her that her toys can easily be confiscated
- Say that she should never be biting the hand that feeds her
- Tell her that the sofa is not a scratching post, that we are NOT ladders
- Tell her that it's no more interesting on the worktop than on the floor
- Explain that she should be over playing with her shit in the litter tray by now
- Bring her gently back out of the trance by stroking her tiny soft paws
27th instalment of ABNORMAL can be found right here:
Whilst the whole novel to date is here:
AND PLEASE LIKE MY FACEBOOK PAGE TOO.
ABNORMAL NEEDS WINGS!!!