Ten Guilt-free Ways to avoid writing...

1 - From work, send yourself an urgent memo that requires immediate attention


2 - Ask someone reliable round for dinner so that you have to promptly clean the house


3 - When drunk, remove the fuse from your P.C so you'll think it's broken when you're sober


4 - Ask a neighbour - no questions asked - to lock you in their shed for a few days


5 - Accidentally slam your hand on the desk, breaking the wrist of your dominant arm


6 - Accidentally delete your book so that you have to return to the drawing board, (feet-up procrastination part)


7 - Ring your doctor and describe the symptoms of Severe Cognitive Dysfunction. Accept a trial of rehabilitation in a dementia-registered home for a week. Or two.


8 - Ask a friend to run you over, gently. Pretend it's for charity


9 - Lather your laptop in marmite & leave it in a small room with your teething puppy


10 - Decide to become a landscape gardener instead.





https://www.facebook.com/AbnormalANovel?ref=hl



SJS :)

How to be cheery when the chips are down

1 - Eat the bloody chips

2 - Go for a brisk walk in the biting spring wind

3 - Open that bottle and don't share it

4 - Seek out comedy and laugh till your bladder splodes

5 - Gurn for the video camera

6 - Share above on facebook

7 - Be nice to people. Give and get back

8 - Eat curry or fill your face with chocolate

9 - Stroke the cat / dog to relieve stress

10 - Stroke your boyfriend / girlfriend / someone's husband..



(Disclaimer: any repercussions are not my fault. You're an adult. You make your own decisions. And if you get beaten up it's nothing to do with me, sorry)



https://www.facebook.com/AbnormalANovel?ref=hl



SJS :)